Gordon Bridge Club Results & Information

2012-01-27T22:52:00.000-08:00

GORDON BRIDGE CLUB 9975 2708

Venues:
18 Cecil St, Gordon (Church hall)
1a Dartford Rd, Thornleigh ("Brickpit" Sports Centre, 200m from Pennant Hills Rd)
2b Carlyle Rd, East Lindfield (Lindfield Bowling Club)

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THORNLEIGH, FRIDAYs:
Note that commencing on 30 Sep 2011, the Friday start time is 10 am: room preparation and talk; play from 10.30 am and finish by 2pm. Short lunch break at about 12.30.
Monday's sessions begin play at 11.30am.

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Due to private commitments this blog is in partial recess until further notice. Thank you for your support over the past few years.
(On a personal basis, I would like to encourage awareness of the needs for successfully managing autism in preschool children.)
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Northern Delights.
An exciting and refreshing culinary experience is available only on Saturday afternoons at Gordon for those bon vivants whose digestive desires are for something different than the usual nibbles at your local bridge club.
This is a Lucullan banquet of extraordinary variety. The smorgasbord-like dishes are generously donated by a select group of world-class chefs and international food consultants well-known for their attempts to achieve the grand slam of dining.

Some of the favourite comestibles are exclusive to the typical cuisine of this establishment. For example, this reviewer considered, after extended tasting, the best dishes to be the delightfully presented local hors-d’oeuvre Sardines Sartor and the Gateau Maurice served with a light dusting of Dummy Icing and Strawberries a la Flemington. The very appropriate Duck was a winner, as was the successful Game.
The eggstraordinary range of sandwiches fit the for the very best high teas has proved popular for years, particularly the fillings known as “Egg the Director”, and “Eggregious Bidding”.

The olde world refectory-like atmosphere of the servery and dining area has extensive water views and is a handy 5 minute run to shops, train or bus. A renovator’s dream…

The maitre d’ has shown finesse with his team of assistant workers who apparently share his enthusiasm for quick service, but further enquiries have shown that these defenceless and vulnerable women have been tricked into slave-like conditions with no contract, no hope of promotion, and have been consistently dealt a poor hand. There must be penalties.
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A personal note to all players who expressed their goodwill in our end-of-year celebrations:
Thank you for your kindness and consideration throughout the whole year. It is indeed a pleasure to work with players such as you.
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Our THORNLEIGH bridge venue is now open as normal. Why not come and enjoy a friendly game? No partner required.
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Recommended Reading:

The Art of Voiding by Woodger Ruffet
You’re The Dealer by Hugo Furst
Defensive Bridge by Ford Ourne
Aggressive Bidding by Hope Anprey
Bridge Signals for Success by Aiden Tother
How Long Do I Hold Up? by Justin Thyme
Careless Card Play by Lars Taggenn
Secrets of Silent Bidding by Dot Yerbidd
When Partner Should Pass by Pat Wunstable
Bridge Partner’s Expectations by Max E. Mumm
Sacrificing in Bridge by Will Gohdown
Support For Your Partner by Jack Singleton
Revalue Your Cards by Adam Goodand
Bridge Etiquette by Mona Lott
How To Find Your Opponents' Weakness by Eileen Nover
Touching Cards by Ivan Naice
The Biggest Misfits in Bridge by Hans Fromelle
Look for Hidden Winners in Bridge by Marc Adek
Psychic Bidding by Mae Wynne
Revise Your Partnership Play by Hugh Shudof
Duplicate Bridge Responses by Ray Smibyd
What Does That Bid Mean? by Howard Eyenoh
The Role of Chance in Overbidding by Winsome Lusomme

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Session Times

GORDON
Monday and Wednesday 10.30 am.
Mon, Tues, Wed Nights 7.30 pm
Saturday 1.00 pm (with afternoon tea).

THORNLEIGH
Monday 11.30am. (Short break for lunch on Mon. and Fri.)
Friday 10 am room prep and talk; play from 10.30am.
Saturday 1.00 pm. (with afternoon tea)
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EAST LINDFIELD
Monday 9.45 am (Supervised);
Monday 12.45 pm (Regular session)
Tuesday 10 am.
Wednesday 10 am.
Thursday 9.45 (Supervised);
Thursday 1.00 pm (Regular session)
Friday 10 am.
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Members: Don't forget that the third session in a week is only $5. That's a bargain...
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BRIDGE DEFINITIONS . (A reprise by Grandad)

WEAK TWO: Long-term partnership with zero Masterpoints.
GRAND SLAM: Bad-tempered losing player leaving the bridge room.
SMALL SLAM: Even-tempered winning player who forgot to open the door when leaving.
ONE SPADE: Progress report from the vet.
TWO SPADES: His and Hers in the garden shed.
FOUR SPADES: Last week’s special at Bunnings. (“I know, Honey, but they were so cheap…”)
SEVEN SPADES: Contents of Snow White’s cupboard.
PASS: Invitational bid (to player of opposite sex).
MINOR SUIT: Primary school uniform.
MAJOR SUIT: Message from your tailor.
INVERTED MINOR: Newborn babe.
VULNERABLE: Said of every player you’ve ever played with.
RESPONDER: Trainee paramedic’s dummy. (No? You just lie down patiently, breathe in, and think…)
ADVANCER: Mini cattle-prod ideal for use on ultra-slow players.
DECLARER: Anyone not carrying a small TV through Customs.
HOLD UP: Support for your (distressed) partner.
DUCK: Movement made when your partner has a “quack” at you.
PENALTY DOUBLES: Arguing with the tennis umpire about Aces.
JUMP SHIFT: A skip move in a very overcrowded bridge room.
BALANCING: When your opponents underbid and you overbid.
HIGH-CARD POINTS: Numerical value of cards -- nominally 40, but often extended to 80. Hence the term “Double”.
DISTRIBUTION POINTS: For a dealer, North, East, South, and West.
OVERTRICK: A rapidly moving thimble...
UNDERTRICK: The pea.
AVOIDANCE PLAY: Insistence on sitting N-S (or E-W).
ATTITUDE SIGNAL: An angry email to partner after the match.
DEALING: Illegal transfer. May lead to extended stay, man.
BIDDING SPACE: Paper grid about 10cm square.
BRIDGE ROOM: Traffic conditions when on Bradfield Highway at 3am.
LOW ENCOURAGE: Gently kicking partner under the table.
ALERT: Loud call to partner who has fallen asleep.
IRREGULARITY: Insufficient bran in the diet.
BID IN ROTATION: Game played at a lazy-susan table.
PACK: Collection of dogs. Well, you say that your hands are!
OPENING HAND: Bodily extremity of expectant upmarket hotel porter.
BIDDING UP THE LINE: Playing at North Sydney, then Chatswood, Gordon, etc.
DONT: Threatening look at partner who’s known to overbid when vulnerable.
DOUBLE DUMMY: A new partnership.
PLAYING TRICKS: Fooling around on April 1.
FAVOURABLE VULNERABILITY: You can kick partner quite easily.
UNFAVOURABLE VULNERABILITY Partner can kick you quite easily.
EQUAL VULNERABILITY: Last packet of sweetener at morning tea.
STEPS OF THREE: Rolf Harris entering the bridge room, singing.

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Don't forget that we have bridge every Friday and Monday at Thornleigh "Brickpit" venue, Dartford Rd, (200m from Pennant Hills Road).
We also have a very friendly session on Saturdays at 1 pm -- with afternoon tea. There is easily accessed undercover parking with wide car spaces. You may use the elevator to the air-conditioned playing area.
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Turn in here to play bridge at THORNLEIGH..

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A very experienced bridge player, driving from the Club, was on the M2 motorway and deep in thought about that day's game. The car phone rang -- his wife was calling: "Dear, there is a warning on the radio about a car driving the wrong way on the M2. Please be careful."
"Yes", he replied, "I may be late home because it's not just one car ...there's hundreds of them!"

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HEARD AROUND THE TABLES:.

Dummy's unexpectedly weak hand was laid down. Declarer knows that a polite thank-you is the normal etiquette:

Declarer: "Thank you..."

Pause. Then with a slight downward change of tone:

"... for what you've got."

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When asked what was meant by the alert of his partner's bid, the player explained: "It means that I don't know what his bid means."
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At Gordon on a Saturday, just prior to the deliciously huge afternoon tea that is a feature of that session:
"I've been struggling for years with my chronic addiction to chocolate. It's been a long, hard battle and, from today, I intend [pause] to keep up that struggle...".
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"For the first time in my bridge career, I didn't know what to do.".
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The English language on a Thursday afternoon: Spoken or written?
"We came third last week."
"We came third last. Weak!".
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"It’s always a relief to Pass – that way I can’t get into trouble!" (Thursday afternoon).
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"I don't know how to play this -- I'll have to faint or something..." (Thursday afternoon player).
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Two players, without partners, independently turned up at our East Lindfield venue on Thursday afternoon and were paired by the Director. Startling confession by one player to the newly-found (temporary?) partner:
"I don't play normally."
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Two visitors came to Wednesday night bridge. One of them opened 1C. When asked "Do you play five-card majors?, the reply from his partner was: "Generally."

DIRECTOR, PLEASE!! (1)

It is really annoying when players find they have too many, or too few, cards in their hand before, during, and at the end of play. Sometimes the correct hands cannot be restored accurately for the next table as they are not always recorded. Nobody is happy then.
Remember: you are required by The Laws of Duplicate Bridge to count your cards before inspecting them. Offenders may be subject to a penalty by the Laws. This situation never pleases the players of either side, nor the Director...

Another annoying fault is the practice of playing a card to the extreme side (i.e. not immediately before them as required by the Laws.). This has caused situations of players claiming that they did not see the card, etc. It's amazing how many different problems this causes.

Also, cards of quitted tricks must not be placed to the extreme side either. The Laws specifically state that they must be placed "near" the player, i.e. not close to the opponent's territory!
Can you see why so many hands have too many, or too few, cards in them even though they were correct at Round 1?

Now imagine this scenario:
About half way through the game South, who has been placing his quitted cards far away towards the left edge of the table, is at last on lead. He places his led card face up on top of the far edge of this neat strip of cards. Tidy, orderly, and camouflaged red on red perhaps.

The next player, West, does not notice this, as it looks like another quitted trick, and sits silently absorbed in his thoughts. Partner finally reminds him to play. He mistakenly believes that he is required to START the next trick and leads a card of a different suit to South's. Who knows if he is discarding or not? No-one.

Inevitably there is /confusion/penalty card/a revoke/3 or 5 or even 6 cards played to the trick, etc, and then the argument starts -- followed by directorial mayhem.

Don't laugh -- this has happened more than once. Variations on this theme could fill a fairly thick book on How to Make Your Director Weep.
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DIRECTOR, PLEASE! (2)

Dummy (the player) is not allowed to control the play in Bridge. Declarer has to plan and play the contract using his own tactics, without illegal advice from his partner.
Suppose the lead is to come from Dummy (the cards) and Declarer erroneously leads a card from hand, or vice versa.
Dummy must not verbally correct that lead. Dummy must remain silent, even though the play is from the wrong hand!!
It is up to the opponents to have Declarer correct that error, OR, accept the error and play to it. They decide, not the Dummy player.
However, Dummy may warn Declarer before the card is led or called.You can see that a smart Dummy may see that the wrongly called card is "bad" or "good" play and speak up only when it is to Declarer's benefit. That is clearly influencing Declarer's play, and that is very naughty!
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DIRECTOR, PLEASE! (3)

When scoring a hand at the bridge table the results "AVERAGE" and PASSED IN" are different scores.
If, because of insufficient time, a hand is not played, then you get an Average, which is always the middle score, and is equal for each side. Also the Director may award an Average if the cards get mixed up, or if some happening prevents the proper score being determined.

However, if each of the four players passed because the hands are such that they could not, or did not, open the bidding (i.e. four Passes), then the score is written as Passed In (or No Bid). This can end up as a top score! Let me explain...

For example, suppose EAST at every other table bid and scored something (i.e. did not go down). At the Passed In table the EAST score is zero which is less than all the other EAST players. That is clearly a bottom board for that EAST.
A bottom for E-W is a top for N-S.

An Average usually makes only a very small difference to your final percentage of the session. It's not worth the energy of arguing about it in most circumstances.
If you are not sure what to write please ask the Director.
I have seen interesting variations written on the scoresheet such as: "No Pass", "All Bid", "No Play" (presumably it was raining), "Passed By", "Average Bid", "Ran out" (To the toilet??), "Passed Out", and finally: "Passed On".
It's a tough game...
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DIRECTOR, PLEASE! (4)

When a player "claims" by saying that the remaining tricks are his, and shows his hand with no further immediate comment, you should call the Director at once if you feel that your side can win a trick. No one can insist on "Play it out".
Of course, when you call the Director some clue is given to the claimant that there might be a way to lose a trick. Therefore if asked how the play would have proceeded the claimant may rethink about his plan and then find and state a line of play that will succeed.

The Laws of Bridge state that the line of play that the claimant proposes to play must be stated when the claim is made. Directors will always give the benefit of any doubt to the opponents if no clear line of play is given at the time of claiming. A Law specifies this.

Also, there are special laws about claiming when there are outstanding trumps. Many claimants have lost a trick (and the contract, possibly) purely because they did not mention the existence of such a trump held by an opponent, and how they were coping with that outstanding trump. Even a small "unknown" trump could win a trick by careless play. The Laws absolutely favour the holder of that trump!!
Every player is considered as being able to play carelessly at times. It is no use saying, later: "Oh, I wouldn't have done that..."

EXPLAIN WHEN YOU CLAIM may seem a waste of time -- just consider it as a safety play!
If you fail to abide by the Laws of Duplicate Bridge, then please be gracious and accept that you "got it wrong". If a Director allows an exception to this Law then the non-offending party is disadvantaged on the scoresheet, and that's obviously contrary to the principles of fair play..

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DIRECTOR, PLEASE! (5)

Some players pass the played boards to the next table several minutes before the Director calls the next move. The table receiving the boards thus may mistakenly pass them on to their next table when the move is called. This is the BDBM transfer, (Bridge Double Board Move), not to be confused with the normal Skip, or that amazing procedure called "Play The Boards Again And Get A Worse Result".
A round or two later we now have a new game being played. It is called BEDLAM, developed as an alternative to that other somewhat confusing game called CHAOS (when East's cards become West's at the hands of the SIT-OUT).
Scoring is then done by a program called SHAMBLES, and the results are printed out in the RIOT font of hieroglyphics using the masterpoints system suitably named HAVOC.
Later, players and Director enthusiastically share their partaking in the after-game activity aptly called FRENZY.
Usually, a couple of players elect to leave the bridge room as soon as possible. ( I hope they read this!!)
NB: The current National Record is an uncorrected triple move of just some of the set of boards at the change. This is no mean feat, as it required high-order oblivion, blended with super slapdash concentration. Competitive play was abandoned. Again.
That Club, I believe, unsuccessfully offered $5000 for anyone to become a Director.(Per session, that is…)

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DIRECTOR, PLEASE! (6)

When preparing the travelling scoresheet, why do some players write a different board number on the front to that on the back? And then not notice that neither matches the actual number of the board? This happens at least once a fortnight on average, (twice in one week in January) substantially slowing down the scoring of results at the conclusion of play, and also speeding up the remainder of the allotted life-span of the frantic Director.
Luckily, our Directors are trained to the level of the Bletchley Park code-breakers ---and remember, we know who you are....
(Unfortunately, we don't know what to do with you! Has anyone any suggestions? Send message in clear, please.)

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DIRECTOR, PLEASE! (7)

One of the left-overs from early bridge beginners’ lessons is the commenting that occurs during bidding, or even during play. Some few players are persisting in uttering remarks that may seem harmless per se , but do indicate something about the value, or nature, of their hands.

This is not in accordance with the Laws of Bridge, nor is it maintaining the correct spirit of fair play. To deliberately exploit this tactic is tantamount to cheating, let alone generating bad karma at the table, and giving oneself a bad image. Just because no-one makes an objection, doesn’t make it proper.

Consider this extreme incident. Defender says to his partner, who was considering which opening card to lead against a high-scoring contract, “Make it a killer lead, partner!” The unusual (and devastating) lead came down, and as a result, that Declarer was the only one that failed that board. Killed by a comment! Top board to the offending side!

One outrageous incident occurred some years ago (at another Club). Opponents were bidding a slam (with comments on the way!) and after the Grand Slam was bid, his potential Dummy despairingly said: “That’s way too high, partner”, or a similar remark. So a defender naturally doubled the bid.
Dummy’s hand was a beauty, and freakish. Clearly a guaranteed 13 trick contract. Now that’s so base. Offender grinned, with no contrition.
Yes, there are despicable people like that!
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DIRECTOR, PLEASE! (8)

Law 73A1 states that “Communication between partners during the auction and play shall be effected only by means of calls and plays.”
This is further explained by prohibiting undue mannerisms, emphasis, inflection, undue hesitation, extraneous remarks or gestures, and alerts not properly given, etc.

When we play “kitchen bridge” in a very relaxed social setting, some of these requirements occasionally get relaxed to a small degree. We have fun -- everyone is happy.

However, in Open duplicate bridge it is impossible to conduct a fair session unless we adhere to the Laws of Bridge. We can still be friendly and warm-hearted to each other and play good bridge in a happy atmosphere if we abide by the ethical aspects of the game. Most of us do that very well.

Occasionally with transgressions of the above sort, directors can be placed in an awkward position where neither side is happy with the subsequent ruling after a complaint or dispute. Especially if these transgressions are a result of “harmless” habits that are difficult (?) to withhold in a more competitive environment. Players may then be accused (or feel accused) of deliberate suspect behaviour and become offended at any suggestion of impropriety. It’s a fine line in competition, so we must try very hard to avoid initiating these incidents.

Consider the player who closes his cards, places them on the table and folds his arms tightly during the bidding. What does this mean? Has he forgotten to shower that day? Are his arthritic fingers giving trouble? Does he want his partner not to bid too high because his HCP are very low?

Consider the players who write their second bid in tiny, light letters while their opening bid was in large and heavier writing. Are they saving ink in an old pen? Are they hoping their opponents may have poor eyesight and get confused? Late to bed last night? Is the second-bid suit shorter or weaker than usual?

Consider the player who exhales exasperatedly after partner bids a new suit. Do they have asthma? Was the curried sausage at breakfast too fatty? Surely they are not showing displeasure with partner's suit!!

Consider the potential responder to partner's bid who says, smiling: "Oh, that's enough", and passes with a flicking action of the pen, and leans back quickly and immediately. Does this player have a train to catch? Partner had better not keep bidding -- we don't want a player to be late...

Unfortunately, there are still a few experienced players who occasionally flout the principles of fairness by commenting or using unnecessary mannerisms during the bidding resulting in their partner getting unauthorised information. Penalties may apply!!

"BODY LANGUAGE" IS AN ILLEGAL TACTIC IN BRIDGE. IT IS ALSO A REFLECTION OF A PLAYER'S INTEGRITY.

Deliberately hovering a "helping" hand over the "recommended/suggested" card to play in Dummy is tantamount to ... well, let's say unfair play! If you do accidental or careless hovering then other players cannot determine if you are doing it deliberately to assist the declarer, or not. It's obviously best not to do it!
The same applies to failure to alert an alertable bid which may cause grief to your opponents' bidding or play. We should try to get those procedural matters done correctly to avoid misunderstandings.

Perhaps we can solve these, and similar problems (there’s a long list of outrageous examples), by playing Rafferty’s rules and change the name of the game to Slipshod (Gotcha version). Just imagine the possibilities – abuse, tumult, violence, riot, commercial TV news…

So players everywhere, let’s enjoy the fruits of our upbringing, and may the friendly and wonderful world of duplicate bridge be a happy, fair and harmonious experience in every game.
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DIRECTOR, PLEASE! (9)

When an infraction occurs (such as a REVOKE, OPENING LEAD OUT OF TURN, or INSUFFICIENT BID, etc), please don't hesitate to call the Director, whose task it is to determine the correction.

The ruling is usually based on a clear-cut situation in which the finely tailored Laws of Bridge restore equity to all players. If the situation is difficult to adjudge immediately (because of the complexity of two or three Laws interacting) the Director may refer to the Handbook and determine a fair solution at a later time in the session.

I know of no incident in our Club where a Director has not been scrupulously fair. You can always speak to the Director at the end of the session if you feel that you have been dealt with unfairly, or if there has been a misunderstanding.

Special Note: It is particularly bad form to harass or to be nasty to any player who calls for the Director to arbitrate on some issue. That is the role of the Director.
(Secret exposed! Directors love being called to the tables.)

DIRECTOR, PLEASE! (10)

A lead is defined as the first card played to a trick.

If a defender leads out of turn when it is Dummy's or Declarer's turn to lead, the Declarer may accept that lead as a correct lead! Acceptance can be either verbal or by playing next in turn in that trick.

Similarly, any lead out of turn by Declarer or from Dummy can be verbally accepted by either defender. It then becomes a correct lead.
Note that if the defenders choose differently, then the next-in-turn player has priority.
Or, if the next player plays to that lead, then the out-of-turn lead is deemed to have been accepted by that player as a correct lead.

For example, suppose Declarer (SOUTH) is running a very long suit in Dummy (NORTH) and is discarding losers in hand. Defenders seem helpless. A common scenario. Further suppose that Dummy has no entries in other suits. Now this careless Declarer leads a card from hand. What can defenders do?
Declarer exclaims: "I'm running my long suit -- I want to keep running the suit. The lead is from Dummy".
Sorry, the Declarer cannot retract that lead. Defenders may (if they wish!)accept that unfortunate lead from SOUTH.
Careless play has its just rewards -- for the opponents!
And, please, accept your error...

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Grandad 's comment:
All that stuff above about unfairness and players flouting the Laws is, luckily, confined to very few players in our Club. The overwhelming majority of players manage to enjoy their games without resorting to such tactics.

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The mini-photos at the left show some of our happy players. If you would like to have your photo added please ask Ian Dixon to oblige. Get his phone number from any Director.

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Various "movements" (such as the usual Mitchell movement) are used at bridge sessions depending on the number of tables. Some movements are less popular, but unavoidable with some small groups. A surprised Director once received a written request for "no more howls at bridge". We all dream and long for such good deals to make that possible.
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The aims of this blog are:

(a) to provide additional information about our Bridge Club,

(b) to raise the standards of various aspects of bridge,

(c) to further promote the friendly atmosphere we have in our sessions.

If you have items of news, stories or information that could be published on this blogsite, please contact Ian. If you have suggestions or comments about this blog, feel free to let me know. People have wonderful stories from a very broad range of life experiences. Why not share it? Get my phone number from Greg or any Director.

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.........Thanks for sharing the bridge blog -- Grandad.

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A companion archival blogsite to this blog has selected stories, comments on Laws of Bridge and procedures, and several clearly explained lessons for improvers and Open players. These articles have been progressively published on this site over the past two years. You can visit the two posts on the archival site by clicking on http://www.gbcarchive.blogspot.com

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© Copyright. All photographic rights are reserved.

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GBC Results & Information

Gordon Bridge Club Results & Information